Carg does things is about the various stupid things Carg does in his daily life of sitting down and doing nothing.
Twitter: https://twitter.com/Craig_Brunet
Hello hello to all 4 of you reading this here blog post. I feel like all of my posts recently have been too "review-y" and actually serious and that I've strayed too far of the roots of this blog: Shitty random stories about stuff that happens to me! I've got a good one for you today, and it goes all the way back to my childhood, with one of my favorite games as a kid: Spiderman by Neversoft for the PC, PS1, N64 and Dreamcast!
This game was the bomb back when I was like, 8 years. I had it for my old Windows 2000 computer back in the day, thanks to a totally not pirated CD of the game I got from my uncle. He even drew a little spider on it, isn't that cute?
Silly Uncle Paul, Spiders only have 8 legs!
I replayed the game recently, and while it hasn't exactly aged well (Just like basically every game from that era), I still think it's a fun game to revisit. However, when revisiting the game, a certain memory came back to me, one that haunted my childhood.
You know those BS rumors that'd you'd hear back in the day about certain games? Yknow, ones like Luigi being in Super Mario 64, Mew being under the truck near the S.S. Anne in Pokemon, stuff like that. I had a similar rumor for this game. You see, one of my friends told me that if you beat the game on hard mode, you'd unlock the ability to play as the Green Goblin, and you'd get to ride his glider thing, and use pumpkin bombs! Doesn't that sound neat? Well, I tried and I tried, and I never managed to beat hard mode, little Carg was just too much of a WIMP! However, when I replayed the game recently, I decided to play through on hard mode and put this old legends to rest! I managed to do it, and what did I find upon beating hard mode?
I unlocked... This. That aint the Green Goblin! No, that's Captain Universe, a costume that does double damage and has infinite HP and Webbing, which is great, yay for putting in no effort in playing this game ever again, but I was promised The Green Goblin, and all I got was cheapy the cheapskate! So yeah, that childhood dream was ruined. However, upon further research, I found out that you can unlock the green goblin by beating hard mode...
...In the movie game!
Well, at least I know HOW that rumor started, my friend must have read about the wrong game online or something. Well, I guess I can finally lay that childhood myth to rest. Now that that's all over with, time to go...
Hey look, it's me with a new post! I finally finished No More Heroes 2, after a good month or two of procrastination. You know things are bad when you procrastinate at playing video games, of all things. As I mentioned in the first no more heroes post, I imedeately started playing this game after the pain in the ass that happened to me at the end of the game. I ended up fighting through the first 2 bosses and tweeting about it in the process.
As you can see from these posts, I did in fact have more fun with the sequel. It's apparently a minority opinion, but I just overall enjoyed the sequel more. I'll do my best to explain my reasons, so let's get right on to it.
No More Heroes 2 takes place 2 years after the first game. Travis Touchdown has returned to Santa Destroy after vanishing for a few years after the events of the first game. While he was away, the City of Santa Destroy has grown into a full fledged city, with tall buildings and junk and is ruled over by the corporation of Pizza Batt (Previously Pizza Butt in the first game, which is a far better name.) The CEO of Pizza Butt, who happens to be the 1st ranked assassin, has killed Travis' best friend, Bishop, the dude who would always bring your bike to you in the first game and worked at the video store. In order to get revenge on Rank #1, you gotta fight your way through all 51 ranks of the United Assasins Ascociation, which is no longer a huge scam like in the first game. The story feels a lot more personal than the first game, since you're out for revenge rather than just doing it for the funsies. Bishop was such a cool guy, he would always bring your bike to you if you pressed 2 on your wii remote. Now that's dedication! He probably had to walk all the way to your bike because you were to lazy to do it yourself. What a great friend.
And yes, you heard read that right. 51 ranked fights! That means 50-ish boss fights, right? Nah, not really. There's only about 15-ish actual boss fights in the game, most of the other ranked members are either workers for other bosses or end up getting killed off screen. This seems to be common criticism of the game, and yeah, I can see where they're coming from. It's kind of disappointing to think there's going to be 50-ish boss fights, but in reality there's just 15-ish. I myself like most of their explanations for how the other ranked fighters die, but yeah it is kind of a filthy lie, especially since the back of the dang box says there's advertises 51 fights! Filthy liars!
LIES
Another thing a lot of people don't seem to enjoy is the games length. It only takes about 10 hours to beat, and there's no overworld for you to drive around. Frankly, the removal of the overworld was one of my favorite parts of the game. I don't think it added much to the first game, all it was there for was a way to pat out the game to be longer than it should have been. Grinding hours to get enough money for the swords was nothing but pure torture and I hated it. I don't care if the made the game longer, it didn't have enough substance to it for me to get much enjoyment out of it. Without it, the game would have been just as long, if not shorter than the second one. Let's be real, no one played this game for the missions in between ranked fights, they played it for the damn ranked fights. Granted, I would have proffered if they tried to improve the overworld rather than flat out remove it, this is Sonic Adventure 2 all over again!
But if there's no overworld, how do you make money? I'm glad you asked. In this game you get money by doing jobs like in the first game, except instead of being mini games, this time they're 8 bit mini games like an old NES game. Some of these are stupidly fun, they didn't feel like chores I had to do in order to make money to get further in the game, they felt more like I was playing an old arcade game of sorts, a separate game that rewarded me in the main game with cool swords and money, not to mention unless you want to get all the clothes, you'll barely have to grind with these.
The Rose Nasty, a new sword in the game
Speaking of cool swords, unlike the first game where swords were direct upgrades of eachother, in this game you can switch out swords on the go, with them all having different properties and upsides to eachother. During a stage or boss, I could switch swords just for the heck of it, whether it be to better fit the situation, or just to change things up. My personal favorite was the Green Beam Katana thingy, due to it's speed and color. I do feel like the dual beam katanas definitely outrank other swords in the game in terms of damage and speed, for sure.
Combat felt a lot nicer, too. There's a few factors that go into this, but the main one being that high and low attacks feel more distinct from eachother, with high attacks being quick and weak while low being slow but powerful. I'm not sure how to describe it, but it just feels a bit more balanced for the most part. One thing I love about this game is that it gave you the option to use a Wii Pro Controller instead of the Wiimote and Nunchuck. At first, I thought to myself: "Psssh, why would I use anything aside from the wii remote, that would just ruin the game's charm!" Then I actually used the pro controller and never used the wiimote and nunchuck again. It's so much easier to do high and low attacks with the Pro Controller, especially since someone thought it would be a good idea to remove the high/low indicator from the first game. With the Wii Remote, you hold it upwards to do high attacks and hold it forwards to do low attacks, then press the A button to swing. With the pro controller, you just press X or Y. It makes things so much easier, you can alternate between the two attacks at the simple press of a button, it makes things so much easier.
Another feature of this game was being able to play as Shinobu. Her gimmick is that you can jump with her. That's it. Let me just tell you that this game engine was not made for jumping. At all. For starters, there's a half second delay between when you press the button and when you actually jump, which is the worst. Second of all, this is an action game, mixing platforming into the mix just doesn't work, If there's one thing I never wanted to do in No More Heroes, it's miss a jump then have to spend a minute going back to where I was originally to try it again. The best concept for a boss fight in this game is ruined by having to do it as this character instead of Travis. Half of the charm of these games is Travis himself and him killing dudes with a Beam Katana. These sections have you play as a character who isn't Travis and don't have you using a Beam Katana, you've taken away everything I love about this game, dang it! There's also a section where you play as Henry, your half brother dude. At least he has a Beam Katana, so they got one half of what makes these games fun.
Overall, is No More Heroes 2 better than the first? I dunno. I do think it's a less frustrating game, however. There were less moments where I just got stuck or spent hours grinding for money and two bosses that made me want to tear my hair out. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! I will say that the first game left much more of an lasting impression for me, for better or worse. Overall, if you had issues with the first game, you'll likely prefer this one. Maybe next time I play the first one I'll have a better time playing, maybe the next time I play this one I won't like it as much. At the end of the day, they're both good games you should totally check out if they interest you.
Happy May the Forth, my readers! For those of you who are unware (all 2 of you) May the Forth is known as Star Wars day, because "May the Forth be with you". Get it? Like the quote from the movie? "May the Force be with you?" May the Forth?MMMMM! FUNNY JOKE!
In order to celebrate this occasion, I'm going to talk about the Star Wars: The Clone Wars TV Show! I never gave a shit about it as a kid and I still didn't until a few months ago. After a few characters from this show appeared in Star Wars: Rebels, a show I really enjoy despite unpopular opinion, I felt the need to go back and see what I missed, plus I just needed to know how the hell Darth Maul isn't dead. I mean, he was cut in half for gods sake! Since I had nothing to do, I figured I might as well watch all 129 episodes of Star Wars: The Clone Wars, or as the logo calls it: "STAR THE CLONE WARS WARS"
The show takes place inbetween episode 2 and 3, in the magical land of the prequels, where Jedi ran free in the Galaxy, Technology was somehow more advanced than the original trilogy, politics, and the like. Most episodes are about battles and conflicts that take place during the Clone Wars between the Republic and the Separatists. From what I understand, the separatists are trying to separate from the ways of the Republic, something something, I dunno the prequels are confusing. Basically Separatists are evil boogeymen who have droids who don't like the Jedi, the end. The show basically jumps between different characters and their conflicts during the war. It doesn't really have much of a continuous plot or anything, but usually the show is broken up into story arcs that usually last 3-4 episodes, with one offs and two-parters mixed in.
The show can be good. Sometimes it can even be really, really good when it focuses on the right things. However, the show is often times plagued by the bad stuff from the prequels, like politics, weird writing, the existance Jar Jar Binks stuff like that. There are entire episodes that focus on nothing but Jar Jar Binks, and they are so bad. No one deserves to watch entire episodes of nothing but Jar Jar Binks and his ear piercing voice, that's just cruel, not to mention this happened in the show for gods sake!
If I had to see Jar Jar Binks being smooched by some random queen lady, so do you. To be honest, I didn't even start enjoying episodes that much until around the second half of the series, when the Mandolorians start becoming relevant, along with those witch chicks. It stopped being a show mostly for stupid children and actually plots that made you think a bit.
Season 4 episodes 7-10 are by far my favorite episodes in the series. If there's one thing the prequels can do well, they can do some pretty damn nice war battles. In this arc, they focus on actual battles with the clones, and the struggles they have to deal with during the war. There was betrayal, twists and actual character conflicts. The opening scene of them riding down on the transport ships and then charging into the battle without any music and just the sound of blasters firing is one of my favorite moments in the entire show. Anything that focuses on the Clones are always my favorite episodes, I'm surprised there aren't more episodes that focus on them, considering the show is called "Star Wars: The Clone Wars". Christ, the word "Wars" is twice in the title, you would think there would have been more battles and war and less talk about "deregulating the banks" or whatever.
By far my biggest complain about the show is something very, very simple, but bugs me to no end: consequences. Characters die a lot in this show, and I do mean a lot. Killing off a character is something that can change the dynamic of an entire show. Death affects everyone related to the characters around them, it gives motivation to their enemies and devastates their friends and loved ones. However, in this show, basically 90% of character deaths happen in one episode, have some emotional tension and then are never brought up again. Obi Wan's long time love interest murdered by one of his greatest enemies? Pshh, no big deal! Jabba the Hutt's son murdered and decieved? Never brought up again, of course! What about the brother of--oops, don't wanna get too spoilery here, but let it be known that even the death of a few major villains are brushed off. If the show doesn't care about character death, why should the viewer? Heck, it's not even just death that has no consequences, characters can get limbs cut off, but they immediately get replaced with robotic replacements with no struggle or anything of the sort.
But hey, let's be positive here!One thing that really impressed me about the show was the animation. While I don't think the animation and art style itself is all to nice to look at, what did impress me was the set pieces. Most episodes have huge worlds as their setting and they almost never reuse the same location twice. The amount of money and dedication that went into this show is insane. The combat could be better, but everything only got better as it went on. By season 6, it had become the nicest looking CG show I've ever seen. One thing I don't like is the character designs. Maybe it's just me, but something about their faces looks... Wrong. Asoka's face in particular looks really weird to me.
I feels like her face has like 50% mace than it should have. I'm just glad she learned about shirts later on in the series, that was a welcome addition.
And thus, I conclude this overly long post. Overall, I enjoyed Star Wars: The Clone Wars. While I may have personally thought it was a very flawed show, I still enjoyed what it had to offer and it let me get a bit of insight on a part of the Star Wars franchise I never truly got acquainted with. I can definitely see why people enjoy it, but it just wasn't for me. However, what is for me is the 2003 Clone Wars mini series, the 2D one. I can watch them over and over, It's probably the best 2D action show I've ever seen, and I highly recommend you check it out. But hey, I could make another post about that. Maybe. Who knows.
Oh, by the way, not only is it Star Wars day, but...
Hey, you there! Mister blog reader! Do you like Fundip? So do a lot of people! Don't you wish you could have like, 5 times more fun dip than a normal package of fundip? Well, have no fear! Introducing the hot new product: G Dip!
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Disclaimers:
G Dip is in fact, very unhealthy, and eating excessive amounts in large periods of time will likely result in a very upset tummy.
Carg Does Things is not responsible for any injuries that may occur due to consumtion of G Dip.
G Dip has been known to cause mass hallucinations such as the following.
Oh it may result in death, which is not a very good thing.
G Dip is in fact not endorsed by Gatorade or any of it's brands.
Don't sue me.
Teen Titans Go is a shitty show.
G Dip may or may not be illegal in some parts of the world.
Back when I was in 6th-ish Grade, my friend played a lot of one game. That game was No More Heroes for the Nintendo Wii. Back then, I had no interest in the game, since it was violent, vulgar, bloody as all heck, contained boobies, ect. It was just too much for little 12-ish year old me to take! However, I am no longer 12-ish. I am a 17 years old manchild who still has the maturity and brainpower of a 12 year old and is ready to play a very violent Wii game! Let us begin.
Essentially, No More Heroes is a 3D hack and slash game where you play as Travis Touchdown, and cut a lot of people into bloody fountains with your beam katana, an everyday lightsaber with a different name to prevent lawsuit. The plot of the game is rather simple: Beat the other 10 ranked assassins in order to become the best assassin there is. As an added bonus, the leader of the assassin association, Sylvia Christel, also promises to have sex with you if you manage to get to the top rank. Now that's what I call motivation! It's a simple plot, the kind of plot I can really get behind, not to mention all the cutscenes are filled with really cheesy bad 80's action film styled dialogue. Sometimes the voice acting and writing does go into actually bad territory, a bit more often than I'd like. At the end of the day, the plot is basically an excuse to go around and cut some dudes heads off. Fun!
I personally love both the design of the beam katana, rather than just being a laser that magically ends at a certain length and breaking all logic breaking the universe, it instead has a thingy that goes down the side and up to the top. It brings some realism to a game where can plow down numerous palm trees with a motorbike without damaging said motorbike.
I personally really want to make a replica of the beam katana in the middle, or possibly the one left since it's the most iconic of the group and the one you get at the start of the game. Or both! I just really love how the sword has a tiny bit of realism, it sure is nice to have such a detail-
The Strongest and final Beam Katana in the game
Oh, nevermind. Well, it was nice while it lasted. Speaking of really cool things I like about this game, let's talk about Travis. His he's basically a giant weeaboo who likes to collect wrestling and anime merchandise. There's something I really like about this character, just the fact that he's a filthy otaku with no life, I relate to that pretty well which probably isn't a good thing. Heck man, just look at his room!
The room of a true assassin
Uhh, but yeah, gameplay! The gameplay is as basic as it can be, you take your sword, and you swing it to cut people. Wee! I can't stress how much fun the gameplay is. Sure, you're just pressing A a lot, but my god, it's so much fun slicing people in half and watching their remains spray out fountains of blood and money. The game structure is what you'd expect, you go from one rank fight to the next, where you do a stage, then have a long fight with the next ranked member. Each stage usually has a unique enough gimmick to make going from stage to stage more fun, such as fighting dudes in busses, or on a train, or maybe you fall asleep and have to do a touhou styled minigame. That was a fun part.
The bosses are definitely some of the best parts of the game, they're basically long duels of skill. Some of my favorites are DestroyMan, who fires giant dick lasers at you, and the large fat woman with a shopping kart laser thingy who hates men and also killed your trainer. It sure was satisfying to decapitate her! However, some bosses really, really grind my gears. Specifically, Shinobu and Bad Girl. I honestly spent 2 hours on both of these fights. I don't mind hard bosses, nor do I mind restarting fights. However, when the boss fights are around 10 minutes each, dying and then restarting the fight gets annoying after a while since it takes so long. I ended up being there for exactly 2 hours and 45 minutes on Bad Girl.
Cutting dudes in half is good and all, however, there is another part of the game I have to mention. While the ranking fights are the main part of the game, inbetween those, you have to gather money! How do you gather money?
By going around in the overworld of Santa Destroy and doing missions over and over, of course! The overworld was cool for about 15 minutes, but once you spend 2 hours in between all of the ranked fights grinding for money to do the next ranked fights and get new katanas, it starts to get a little annoying. An example of some of the missions you have to do is kill the CEO of a chain of restaurants named "Pizza Butt" or gather coconuts and bring them to your employer. Fun for one short mission, not fun when you need to do them countless time to get enough money to go to the next fight. As much as I love the city of Santa Destroy, I think I spent about half of the game in the overworld mindlessly grinding, when I should have been slicing dudes in half.
Sir Henry, Secret Boss Dude
One final thing I need to mention is what happened to me at the end of the game. At the end of the game, there are two endings: A fake out one where you get killed while you're taking a shit on the toilet, and an ending that you get if you've bought all the swords, where you fight your twin brother Henry (He's Irish!) in the parking lot of your motel. It's an intense final fight, and he even did the whole crossguard lightsaber before episode 7, except with two extra lasers for the guard! Of course, before I went to that, I wanted to see the joke ending. After the ending, it took me to the save screen and told me to clear my game. Being an idiot, I thought it just meant adding a little "cleared!" thing next to my profile. I was wrong. Instead, it deleted my save file. I wouldn't be able to fight Henry without replaying the entire game all over again. So basically, my reaction was:
How could they do this to me? That fight looked so fun, now I'll never be able to do it without replaying the whole game, nor will I be able to reload my save and get the rest of the items in the game, or anything of the sort. It pissed me off SO much that I immediately started playing the sequel. I'm not sure why that was my first response, but hey, now you can look forward to a post about the sequel sometime soon.
In short, No More Heroes is a good game, but a flawed game. The voice acting and writing is kind of weird, the gameplay can get boring, especially with some of the overworld stuff, but at the same time, it's so stupidly fun that I can ignore most of the flaws and just have a good, mindless time slicing dudes into nothing but a bloody mess. For now, I'll end the post with the best way to save your game in any game I've ever seen: Taking a shit on a toilet.
EDIT: My twitter got unlocked, so most of the stuff on this article is kind of invalid. I'm going to keep it up, just because the story is funny. I do now I post on it and stuff, so you can get to it here.
"Yknow, I feel like I don't post enough here. I mean, I know I made like 4 posts back to back recently, but that was for school! What if there was a way to post stupid things and shitpost in a really short, quick, and frequent manner as well as update people on my dumb life?"
These were the thoughts that inspired me to try and get a twitter. The keyword here is "try". I've been thinking about getting a twitter recently, since I do like to read through twitters of various YouTubers and cartoon creators to see what they're up to, like Alex Hirsh, the Creator of the now concluded TV Show "Gravity Falls" rip in peace. Just reading about dumb stuff these people do in their spare time amuses me. Maybe I'm just a Nosy Nelly or something. I thought there must be other Nosy Nelly's out there who'd want to read about what I do in my life, so hey, I might as well make a Twitter? I usually despise social media, but hey, let's make an exception!
So, I went and made a twitter! You can visit the twitter here. You may notice that there's only 1 post. 1 singular post, featuring a dumb reference to that awful game, Bubsy. "Why don't you make more posts, Mr. Carg? I wanna stalk your every move and know what you're doing in your day to day life, since I don't have one of my own!" Don't worry, I know how you feel. Let's discuss the reason why there's only one post, shall we?
After making that glorious singular post, I went to watch one of my favorite movies, Castle In The Sky, with my family. (They all fell asleep while watching the movie. I don't think they liked it very much.) After the movie was done, I went upstairs to go make my glorious second twitter post, only to be told I was locked out of my account. My first reaction was:
Why did I get locked out of my account? Did I rustle someone's jimmies by posting about Bubsy Bobcat? Was it the link to my blog, which was on another site? Was 17 not old enough to have a twitter? That can't be the case, unless everyone in my school lied about their age. But then the second part happened.
And then my reaction was more
Why did I need a phone to unlock my account? I guess that makes sense, it could confirm it's me and not some random person who broke into my 1 hour old account, but here's the problem. I don't own a phone. I'm basically locked out of my stupid account until I buy a device I would never use, aside from playing Downwell on the go. That doesn't seem worth a monthly payment of 40$ or however much a phone bill is. I tried emailing them about it, but all I got was an automated email telling me how to connect my phone. "Well, whatever, I guess I won't be posting on twitter anytime soon. At least it's over with!" I thought to myself. I was wrong.
I go to look at my emails, and what do I find? Emails from Twitter! That's right, even though I can't access my account, and twitter support didn't do crap to help me, they're still sending me emails about people I should follow, and if I "know how to tweet". I can't even turn them off in my Twitter's setting, since twitter locked me out of my account. Thanks, Twitter! I could of course block the email address, but that would just send them to my junk mail, it wouldn't stop the messages from being sent.
Maybe I'll solve this eventually, but for now, I just felt like aimlessly ranting about this platform and my struggles with it. Perhaps, one day, the Carg Twitter will be unlocked, and I'll be able to post about dumb things for all of your viewing pleasure. Wait, what's this on the "report" Page? A new option? Let's see here...
Yknow, maybe being locked out of this site wasn't such a bad thing after all.
Guess what crappy blog just reached 1000 views? This one! Isn't that something? It is indeed. How will we celebrate this occasion, you ask? Why, by ending a running joke that was never funny! That's right, guess who got Marvel Vs. Capcom 3? This guy! Time to celebrate!
I managed to find myself a copy of Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 at my local family video for 10$. Family Video sells all of their old rentals for 10$ each, which meant I could get the game in all of it's glory. I got the PS3 version of the game, however, I don't actually own a PS3. Talk about putting the carriage before the horse, eh? Until I get PS3, it's just going to be sitting on my shelf, next to Jojo's Bizarre Adventure: All Star Battle. I think I'm going to be building up a collection of games I can't play. Thankfully, all is not lost; My cousin has a PS3! Until I get one of my own, I've been playing the game on there during the weekends. I also managed to learn that my Fightstick works on the PS3. I'm relieved, now I won't need to spend an extra 60$ to buy a PCB that works on PS3. It doesn't work on the 360 though as far as I believe, I guess that's just more reason not to get one. Now, onto the review!
Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 is basically everything I thought it was, a 4 button fighter with Marvel and Capcom characters. The combos are insane, X-Factor is overpowered, and there is button mashing. It's quite the fighting game, if I do say so myself. I don't have much I can really say, aside from it's really fun, but has a pretty steep learning curves for people who suck at it, like me.
I feel like I've been playing too much Marvel Vs. Capcom 2 recently, I've built a bit of a muscle memory for that game. It's kind of hard to get into playing the third one, I keep accidentally trying to do Marvel 2 combos, but hey, I'm enjoying myself, but I do have a few problems, but most of them are very minor. For example, one of my favorite characters from the last game, Tron Bonne, feels a lot weaker this time around. I'm also not too fond of the cut characters in the game. Most people were upset that MegaMan isn't in the game, but I myself am more upset that Gambit isn't in this one. He was my favorite character...
I'm really upset about some of the cut characters, a lot of the more unique characters are gone for more popular characters. But hey, you win some, you lose some. Either way, we got Zero! Screw MegaMan, we got Zero! And the dog from Okami! The one with the name I don't feel like trying to spell! Oh yeah, and Modok. Not sure what he's doing here. Oh, and Deadpool. Can't forget Deadpool. He has a Hyper Combo move where he takes the Hyper bar and beats your opponent with it, what's not to love?
Anyways, that's all for now. At long last, Marvel Vs. Capcom 3 has been posted about. I finally have it in my hands! Now it's time to move on to better things...
...Such as Ultimate Marvel Vs. Capcom 3! This is the best version of the game, it has more characters, like Hawkeye, and Phoenix Wright! Wow! Isn't that great? I can't wait to get it!
Man, I really suck at Marvel VS. Capcom 2. It's pretty dang hard to get combos going, the game is unbalanced to hell, plus there's no Zero. At least Gambit is in that game, Gambit is awesome. Oh yeah, and Servbot, those guys are adorable, too bad he's total garbage in that game. Wait, I'm supposed to talking Sonic Adventure! Oops.
There was a point in grade school where I was completely obsessed with Sonic The Hedgehog, While it's super cringeworthy looking back on it, it really was a really fun back when I was 10. One of my favorite Sonic games was Sonic Adventure DX on the Gamecube. Recently, Sonic Adventure has gotten quite a negative reputation as aging really poorly, being a buggy mess, and even just being an overall bad game. The game was recently on sale on Steam, so I figured I'd buy it and see how I feel about it. Does it still hold up? Is it a good game? Continue reading to find out!
Accurate Image of Sonic Adventure
Frankly, after replaying most of the game, I think it has aged about as well as leaving a ham sandwich outside since 1999, or 1998 if you live in Japan. The sandwich is old and gross, and it probably tasted a lot better when it was first made. However, even though that sandwich is old, there's still a bit of flavor and goodness hidden deep inside the sandwich that some sick person could still get some enjoyment out of it. That's me. I'm the sick person. I think Sonic Adventure is fun. I ate the 17 year old sandwich.What have I done?
Now, in order to justify my enjoyment of the game, I must state my reasons! That's how the whole debate thing works, right? The game is old, broken, buggy and all that stuff, but I think that may be one of the reasons I like playing it so much. It has a good balance of "so bad it's good" and actual good features. I myself just have a good time making fun of the game, I love spindashing and building up infinite speed, running into something and watching the camera give itself a seizure, glitching into the floor and falling out of the world, and of course, Big the Cat jokes never get old. Those never fail to make me laugh.
Quality lip syncing right here
By far one of my favorite parts of the game it's atrocious voice acting. I swear, I quote some of these lines without even realizing it sometimes. The delivery and horrible writing really makes these some of the most memorable voice acting in any video game. I can't even understand how someone could act this horribly, even my sub-par acting is better than this. It's truly a joy to watch such disastrous performances. However, my personal favorite part of the voice acting is the lip syncing. I've seen bad lip syncing, but nothing, nothing compares to this. Their faces stretch and wiggle around, they don't even remotely match the lines being delivered. I can't even explain it properly, it has to be seen to be believed.
Frankly, I know the game isn't very good, but I can't help myself from having a blast when I play it. Maybe you agree with me, maybe you think the game is a steaming pile of poop, but either way, we can all agree that the lip syncing is amazing.
Yknow, I've been playing a lot of Marvel VS. Capcom 2 recently, and while it's not my favorite game ever, I do enjoy it quite a bit. One of my favorite characters in the game is Tron Bonne, a character from the Megaman Legends games. While I don't think she's that great in this game, I really like playing as her, mostly because I enjoy the games she's from, as well as her character and personality in general. However, the main reason I like to play as her is not Tron herself, but in fact, the tiny little robot to her side.
Behold, the Servbot!
(The little dude on the left)
Servbots are essentially little LEGO people that Tron Bonne constructed to be her servants, and my god, they're amazing. There's just something inherently adorable about their design that makes me want to hug them. Imagine having an army of these little dudes cooking your meals, doing your laundry, tucking you in at night, doing your school work, unleashing their ultimate power onto your greatest enemies, crushing anyone who apposes you under their tiny little bodies, robbing banks, conquering nations... Wait, forget those last few parts! I can't have people knowing my plans...
But maybe you've never played a MegaMan Legends game, and yet you still recognize these little guys. Well, they do cameo quite a bit in some other Capcom games, the Dead Rising series in particular. In those games (From what I've seen at least, I have yet to play them myself) there are various stores containing Servbot related merchandise. You can play through this violent zombie apocalypse game wearing a giant Servbot head, and it is truly glorious.
I'm not one for zombie games, but I want to play this game just to go around wearing a Servbot head and beating people with Servbot heads.
But yeah, that's my opinion on the Servbots. They're adorable, and I love them, and so should you!
...
Wait a second. Servbots are small, indestructible, yellow and blue, adorable servants that work for an evil doer... Where have I heard of that before?
OH GOD
Well, I I didn't think it was possible for me to hate minions more, but once again I was proved wrong. Stupid minions, copying Servbots! For shame! I hate the Minions so much that I'm not even going to talk about it right now! Nope! This post is long enough as it is, the minions deserve their own post to be completely destroyed. Besides, this isn't a post about the minions, this is a post about Servbots, and how adorable they are!
Look at this little guy, I just want to hug him! You sweep that floor, little guy! Make your boss happy!
One final note I'd like to point out is Tron Bonne's "Lunch Rush" move from the Marvel VS. Capcom games. In this move, all of the Servbots run by you to get their lunch, trampling over your opponent. A really nice detail I felt like pointing out is that the move does 41 hits, and there are 41 Servbots in total from the MegaMan Legends games. It's little details like that which make me want Marvel Vs. Capcom 3! One day.
Oh yeah, Servbot is also in Marvel VS. Capcom 2! He's the worst character in the game. Isn't that fun?
Remember in the last post when I said I wouldn't have Marvel VS. Capcom 3 on the next post? Well, I was correct! However, I did manage to get a Dreamcast emulator working so I could play Marvel VS. Capcom 2.
Now then, on to the topic of the current post! Over the Christmas break, one of my good friends bought me a game on Steam that I had my eye on for a while: Euro Truck Simulator 2. I'm not quite sure why, but I heard the game was pretty good, so I added it to my wishlist, and now here we are.
What do you do in Euro Truck Simulator 2, you ask? Well, you drive trucks. In Europe. This isn't a silly simulator game like Goat Simulator, or Rock Simulator ( A game where you stare at a rock), this is a normal, full fledged truck simulator where you drive trucks. In Europe. It's really nothing more than just that, driving trucks. In Europe. You can have different kinds of cargo too, you could have a normal box truck, or you could be delivering vehicles, or maybe driving a tanker!
You may be thinking to yourself: "Carg, that's really boring! Why would you play this game? All you do is drive trucks! You could do that in real life! Get a job, you unemployed loser!" First of all, you don't need to be so mean about it. Second of all, I suck at driving, and when I say suck, I mean I suck at driving. If I had a job as a truck driver in real life, I'd probably crash in a ditch and die, and then all of that precious cargo would be lost! Also, I don't live in Europe, so I could never be a Euro Trucker, unless I really felt like moving across the ocean to drive trucks for a living. The weird thing about this game is that it should be boring, it shouldn't be fun, all you're doing is driving. But for some reason, I keep playing this game! It's so addicting, I've made around 60,000 in game Euros so far! I can't even explain what's so fun about this game to me, but there's something really satisfying about driving a huge truck around. It's fun to just go to different places, and see cool looking hills while driving.
One of my favorite parts of the game is the radio feature. There's an in game radio that lets you play a radio from a list of online radio stations, which is one of the reasons I bought the game, it just sounded really cool to me. I could be a real trucker, listening to music and junk! I could listen to music! While driving a truck! In Europe! In a video game! Wooooah! My personal favorite station is "HotMixRadio", a French Station that plays 80's music, but doesn't play any french music. Don't question the logic of HotMixRadio!
This here is Senor, the character profile I picked for my save file. I like to picture Senor as a Mexican outlaw who escaped to Europe to become a truck driver to get away from his crimes against his country. I actually just picked him because he looks like the guy who runs a store near my grandparents house
If I were to have one major complaint about this game, it's driving in the United Kingdom. It's more of a personal complain, but my god, driving there is awful for one main reason: They drive on the left side! It goes against everything I've ever known, how am I supposed to drive on the left side of the road? What makes it worse is that when you're in the UK, most of the time you're using a truck with a wheel on the right side of the car, which makes it even more confusing to me! Not to mention that the speed limits seem a lot higher over there, which resulted in a lot of crashes, and my truck sustaining 35% damage by the end of it. Granted, I'm sure people in the UK feel the same way about the right side of the road, but man, I can't stand it. I'm making sure to avoid any and all routes involving the UK.
One other weird problem I have with the game is the performance. I'd like to think I have a pretty good computer, it can run most games I play at a high framerate, but for some reason, Euro Truck Simulator 2 runs incredibly poor on my computer. I can't get 30FPS on anything above low graphics settings, which is really odd. Maybe it's just me, but I don't understand how I can run Team Fortress 2 at over 60 FPS on high-ish settings, but can't get over 30 FPS on a game where you drive trucks in Europe.
And that's about all I have to say about Euro Truck Simulator 2. It's an oddly fun game, and I do recommend playing it if you're interested in it at all. It's a great game to play while listening to a podcast, watching a TV show, or talking with some friends simultaneously. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to play some- Wait, this game has DLC? And mods?
Good day, readers! Guess what I didn't do today? Play Marvel Vs. Capcom 3! Tis' a shame, truly. Either way, since I can't talk about that, I might as well talk about a game I recently bought, so here we go!
I grew up on the Pokemon games, and I still play them to this day. I'll usually play them on my long bus rides to school, or road trips to visit family. While it may be childish to say this, these games are very close to me, and mean a lot. My favorite games in the series are probably the spin off series of games, Pokemon Mystery Dungeon. The gameplay is you go in these dungeons with randomized small mazes, and your goal is to get to the stairway to go to the next floor. These games are pretty basic, but require a lot of strategy. I don't think they're for everyone, but my god, I love them so much that it's probably unhealthy. I've played through the first 2 games more than I should have, I could have been using that time for school or something. Either way, I figured I'd talk about one of the entries in the series I played recently, and give my opinions on it.
Pokemon Mystery Dungeon Explorers Of Sky is an updated version of the second game on the Nintendo DS, Pokemon Mystery Dungeon Explorers of Time/Darkness. These games need to learn how to have shorter titles Despite that the second game was one of my favorite things to play as a little 10 year old Carg, I never got Sky for some reason. However, now that I'm a grown up and junk, I decided to buy the game for 30$ used from a Game Store.
Overall, this is definitely this is certainly the best version of the game. It adds a few new starter characters, and includes a few small changes throughout the game, such as new items, shops, and improved some features of the game. Finally, at long last, the Croagunk Swap Shop actually makes sense! The main, big feature of this version is the 5 bonus stories that unlock while you play the game. They're small, short campaigns that let you play as secondary characters from the main story. This is the real meat and potatoes of this version, it's really interesting to play as characters that have a unique and different playstyle than what I usually use. Not to mention all of the stories in these missions are really cute, short and simple. They usually explain some backstory to the character, it's really interesting seeing the stories of other characters. I really wish there were more than just 5 of these, they're really fun to play, and have a nice story. I feel like these stories would make for good DLC in later, games. You could pay 10$ or so for a pack of extra mission starring other characters, I think that would be pretty cool. I always love seeing secondary characters being put into the spotlight, sometimes I feel like they can be more interesting and entertaining to watch than the main protagonists.
Here's a summary of all of my opinions on the special episodes in the game:
Bidoof's Wish:
Probably the episode with the most different playstyle than what I'm used to. Not only are you stuck with playing as Bidoof, an incredibly weak Normal Type Pokemon, you also have to deal with your awful partner that has an ability that constantly makes the weather hail, meaning you're forced to slowly take damage anytime you're with him. Thanks for nothing, Snover. It has a nice, cute story to go along with it too. I do have a huge conspiracy theory for this mission though, maybe I'll talk about that someday.
Igglybuff the Prodigy:
By far the easiest special mission, hands down. Igglybuff can kill anything in one or two hits maximum, and nothing ever seems to do much damage to him. Despite this, I feel like this mission is very fun, and has a really cute story. It's really entertaining to see a character who has such an important role in his youth, and that's where I think most of the charm of this episode comes from. The ending also made me sad, so that's something.
Sunflora's Mission Who's name I don't feel like looking up:
This mission wasn't bad, but I do feel like it was certainly one of the weakest both in terms of story and gameplay. I believe that my biggest problem with the mission is that Sunflora is a really weak Pokemon, making it a pretty hard episode. Despite it being hard, however, it's not the fun kind of hard. I guess the one positive is that the story had me guessing a lot, but aside from that, it was meh.
Here Comes Team Charm:
Behold, a probably unpopular opinion! This mission is laaaame. It's my least favorite by far, and I blame the characters you play as, team charm. They're so bland and boring it's ridiculous. They're entire personality is that they're basically the best team ever, and they're perfect and junk. All the other NPCs are saying that they're the coolest team ever throughout this mission, despite that I never see them doing anything cool or interesting. You know what's fun to watch? A character with flaws and motivations, not a group of perfect girls who succeed without trying and get constant praise from everyone for doing everything on the first try. Another thing that bugs me is that I'm forced to play as the weakest member of the team, Lopunny. The mission would be a lot more bearable if I could control one of the other team members, but instead, I'm forced to play as the brittle support character. It would be much more enjoyable if I had control of the other two physical characters, since I don't think it's a good idea to have the character who should be in the back healing people should be in the front taking all the hits.
Definitely the most cinematic of all of the episodes. I really enjoy this one, mostly because I really like the setting of the future and the characters that go along with it. My favorite part is when they went to blizzard island, it was really cool seeing a familiar area in the future. We only saw the future of the hidden land in the original game, it makes me wonder what the other areas were like in the future. I'd like to image treasure town has been burned to the ground. This mission also probably has some of the best life morals I've seen in a story in ages, which you really wouldn't expect from Pokemon. The only real problem I have with this episode is the ending. (Spoilers from here on out, if you actually care) Since it is technically a game made for kids, they had to give it the perfect, happy ending where everyone is OK, rather than having a bittersweet ending. I thought that it was going to end with everyone being dead, but noooo, they come back to life and everything is all cheery. Booo, lame! You don't give everyone some of the saddest deaths I've seen in recent time and then just have them come back to life for the sake of a happy ending. Booo! Shame on you, shame!
So there are my overall opinions on the bonus episodes. I think they're a great addition to the game, this is certainly the best version of the game. However, is it worth getting this game over the other version? In my opinion, not really. While this may be the best version of the game, I usually see it for about 3 times as much as the other two versions of the game.You could easily get another version, and still mostly have the same experience. I mean, the original game was 10$ at a used game store, while I got this version for 29$ at that same store. Heck, just look at the prices on amazon:
I love this version of the game, but I really don't think it's worth an extra 30$. If you can get this version, go for it, but otherwise you're essentially paying for an overpriced DLC that should have been included with the game. So, in other words, most games nowadays!
But yeah, like I was saying: Best version of the game, more expensive than it should be. I recommend playing the other two versions if you're interested in these games, or if you really feel like spending the extra money, buying the Sky Version. As a final note, I feel like this game is a lot easier than I remember it being, I barely had any trouble playing this game. That's all for this post, see you next time, where I still won't have Marvel Vs. Capcom 3.
